Updated: Jan 29
After I gave birth to my son in 2016 I learned to hold myself accountable. I had to take responsibility for the place I was in Iife. I was dealing with a lot raising my son and taking care of my ill mother. I wanted so bad for a drastic change, so towards the end of 2018 I got my haircut into a short style. I always wanted to cut my hair, but I was scared I would not like it. ( I wasn’t much of a risk taker in my younger days). I absolutely loved my short hair. That’s actually my favorite hairstyle. I looked and felt more my age, not like a little girl, but there was one problem. I was natural and the styles would not last. I was getting my hair done every other week. The maintenance was just too expensive. So I decided to grow my hair back and during that process I rocked my natural fro, which I also loved. I felt free in knowing I was wearing a hairstyle that wasn't common to others. Once my hair grew long enough I wore braids, but I still was searching for something in my life to be different. I then dyed my fro blonde. I lost my mom in 2019, which is something I'll never heal from. Fast forward to 2020 which was an unexpectedly crazy year for us all. I was not proud of the decisions I was making personally, so I still had that feeling of needing a drastic change.
Back then I didn’t fully realize it, but that drastic change had to come from within. I kept changing my hair, but I still wasn’t satisfied because changing my hair was not going to solve my problems. Midway through 2020. I wanted to not only be better, but to do better. Years prior it used to be brought to my attention that I should loc my hair, but my excuses
( which is something I hear a lot ) was “I don’t want to go through that rough phase when my hair is really short” and “I like to switch hairstyles and locs are permanent”. I sat and evaluated my life and it hit me (I had to loc my hair). I so badly needed discipline, consistency, and to mean exactly what I said. I needed to make a commitment to myself. I believed if I loc’d my hair and stuck with it I could do whatever I set my mind to.
From day one I was able to see the beauty in my locs. I envisioned them flourishing fast. I absolutely did not go through that rough/ugly stage that people try to convince others of. I miss my short hair, but I do love my locs. I even wore hair jewelry the first day I got my starter locs. For anyone that’s thinking about locking their hair here is your sign. When talking about locs with other people I hear those same excuses I made. I’ve realized that it’s really a commitment issue and if you’re afraid to commit to a hairstyle imagine all of the other things you’re holding yourself back from. It’s on your mind for a reason so just do it and you’ll see how freeing it is to embrace your natural locs. I don't recommend those cheating methods. I personally don't believe the effects are the same.
I am here to tell you there is no rough phase. You and your hair are beautiful no matter what style you want to wear and you are not stuck with one style just because you have locs. You can style your locs a lot of different ways and if you change your mind you can comb your locs out rather than cutting your hair. It’s been one year and eight months since I started this journey and not only has my locs grown, but I have grown so much in the process, hints to Watch Me Blossom, so me and my locs are going to continue to grow and I’m excited to see my growth at the two year mark. Everything is a process. You just have to trust it.